Happy Mama, happy baba!

Did you know that your kids attune to your nervous system? So if you are stressed and in fight or flight mode with a sympathetic nervous system response – blood going to your arms and legs to flee and away from your internal organs – on a subconscious level this registers with them.

It’s a clever survival design left over from when physical threats in our environment meant we needed our kids to run when we did, with boosts of adrenaline for everyone to help them along. If your stress levels go up, so do theirs.

One of the best things you can do for your kids at this time of pandemic panic is to consciously make space to wind down your nervous system into a parasympathetic response – or rest and digest.

Your nervous system is either on (sympathetic) or off (parasympathetic), there’s no in between. And most of us run on sympathetic spikes of cortisol and adrenaline more than is good for us.

When we go into parasympathetic and we feel relaxed, our body understands that there is no threat in our environment and we are safe to expend energy digesting our food, processing our emotions, sleeping, resting. A candlie-lit bath, a walk, meditation, can wind you down.

When we are relaxed and present with our kids it allows their nervous system to wind down too. On a primal, subconscious, nervous system level response, having an attentive adult presence is vital for their survival.

The younger they are, the more vital it is for them to feel safe. If they don’t feel safe for long periods, they will get anxious and withdrawn, or loud and demanding – depending on their temperament!

They’re not ‘attention seeking’, they’re looking to feel safe. If you give it to them, life will be better.

But first of all, let’s get YOU sorted.

Here are 5 ways to calm your nervous system:

• Deep Intentional Belly Breathing - breathe right down into your tummy and hold your breath for 2 seconds, then exhale slowly. Repeat for anywhere between 2 minutes and 5 minutes.

• Gratitude Practice. The Institute of Heartmath has spent the last 20-something years researching how certain emotional states impact your overall heart intelligence and well-being. According to their research positive emotions and positive feelings such as gratitude, appreciation, contentment, and inspiration activate heart coherence and Parasympathetic Nervous System activity.

  In our house we have a family ritual of asking ‘what was your favourite part of today?’ at the dinner table to help increase feelings of gratitude.

• Singing, chanting or humming. These activities increase vagal tone (the vagus nerve is the part of your body that DECIDES whether you are in sympathetic or parasympathetic response).

  You can definitely get the kids involved here!

• Do a meditation or body scan practice. There is a lot of evidence now that shows meditation stimulates the parasympathetic NS response.

  If you want a bit of support on this, then keep scrolling down and sign up to my newsletter for a guided practice.

• Move your body - especially yoga! Yoga has been shown to stimulate and tone the vagus nerve and put your body into a parasympathetic reponse.